Thursday, February 21, 2008

Online Douchebags

Greetings, everyone! And by everyone, I mean (of course), Mom, Dad and the three queens that read this fucking thing. I love you all... except this douchebag:

So I hopped on good ole gay connexion.org to find this in my inbox:

": wow man for putting a blog out there.. you should back it up with some interesting substance- good writing or at least some hot pics. i guess you can only work with what you have... apparently thats not much dude."

Well thank YOU, Marc! So nice of you to take time out of your busy day of 'advertising' to not only read my blog, but crudely disect it in an email on some bullshit site. You sweet little lamb of god! Let me return the favor!
First off, I don't know if this qualifies as interesting substance or a 'hot pic.' Oh gosh, I hope this is good enough for you! My whole world would just END if some f@g from New York doesn't appreciate my blog!

Instead of concentrating on the visual atrocities (you might want to go back to the bar and pick up those chromosomes you dropped), I just want to point out a few choice pieces from the 'about me' section. "Masc, Vgl but humble..." Clearly! Though you may want to take a look in good ole Webster before you start throwing such contradicting babble. Seriously though, if you refer to yourself as 'vgl,' humble is NOT a word you need in your self describing vocabulary. Third, 'vgl' is VERY much in the eye of the beholder, good sir. This reminds me of hotornot.com where ANYONE can make at least a 8.5 out of 10. By these standards, good sir, you are indeed, 'vgl.' OH! And thanks for following up with 'handsome,' just in case we missed 'vgl' to begin with! Good Call.

(Am I right in thinking 'VGL' means Very Good Looking? Because if you mean it as Very Gay Looking, Vindictive Gas Legions, Vain Gambling Lech, or... *other,*then... my bad.)

Let's skip ahead to what kind of people you like: "balanced, intelligent gentleman..." (no, not gentlemen - gentleMAN. No need to conjugate on connexion.) So you are looking for someone to balance you out, perhaps? (Am I reaching here?) Someone who finds it amusing to pick at random strangers online? Who needs a Sunday crossword puzzle when there are millions of blogs to critique?

And then you identify back to yourself (Wow: even when describing who you want to meet, you bring it back to yourself. Way to GO, Marc! You're an absolute gem!) with: "Southern Hospitality here..." What a laugh! I'm actually FROM the south, you dirty equivocator, and no where, from Florida to North Carolina, have I witnessed this sort of unwarranted rudeness. (Oh, and by the way, this response is tooooootally warranted.)

So, Marc, I'm not sure what crawled up your ass, or who wouldn't crawl up there, to put you in such a foul mood as to attack my silly little blog - but I'm sorry you had to go through whatever it was or wasn't . As this blog is lacking in substance and/or hot pics, I'm sad that you may never make it back here to read my quaint little attempt at a humorous rebuttal.

And, Mr. Humble, I'm guessing that you get away with a LOT because of your 'vgl' status. So what are you going to do when you don't have that six pack any more, and are just a bitter, saggy queen?...

Oh shit! What am I going to do when I lose MY six pack?!? Oh Nooooooez! Well, at least I'll have my blog, my Mac and my cats...

Meow

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Trailer! Looks like you have picked up your very own (univited, uncouth, unappealing), stalker! Congratulations!!! At least he has one person is his fanclub (counting himself) whilst you have thousands of hot, well mannered, cultured friends and supporters (with me as the president of your fanclub!)from sea to shining sea. According to your comments, he has hot abs. Sorry--Icouldn't really tell because I couldn't get past the trainwreck face and the shit covering the pics of him you posted. Oh well. If you have seen one douchebag you have seen them all! Love you lots--miss you mcuh! Big kisses from ATL! Pats

Anonymous said...

LMAO. Love you..

Anonymous said...

omg..that was funny.

someone should message him the link.